

Derek Hagen, CFA, CFP®, FBS®, CFT™
“When you talk, you are only repeating what you already know. But if you listen, you may learn something new.”
-Dalai Lama
As financial life planners and advisors, we often sit across the table from clients who rely on us to guide them through complex decisions. Yet in one conversation, I found myself caught off guard when a client asked, “So, what do you think?”
I froze. I hadn’t been truly listening. Sure, my ears were open, but my mind was drifting. When the client prompted me for feedback on her story, it became glaringly obvious that I hadn’t absorbed much of what she’d just said. I was busted. Even worse, I had to scramble to look as though I had been paying attention.
This moment highlighted the importance of being present as a listener. Mindful listening is about giving undivided attention to our clients—hearing not just their words, but also the feelings and context behind them.

The Cost of Distractions
Distraction is the enemy of presence. In our always-on world, distractions hit us from every angle: phone notifications, urgent emails, social media pings, and even our own wandering thoughts. Advisors, especially, juggle countless client needs and administrative tasks, so it’s easy to slip into autopilot mode.
Yet our minds can’t occupy two places at once. If you’re ruminating on a recent market shift—or daydreaming about your weekend—you simply aren’t listening to your client in that moment.

For clients who trust us with their finances and personal goals, a lack of presence can erode the advisor-client relationship. We miss vital cues about their emotional state, life circumstances, or concerns they haven’t fully articulated yet.

Subscribe for Updates
Get notified when the latest articles are published.
Staying Present
Mindful listening means being fully in the moment with your client—mentally and emotionally. It’s letting go of the impulse to check your phone, to plan your response ahead of time, or to drift into unrelated thoughts. Your mind will wander (it’s human nature!), but the key is to notice when it does and gently guide your attention back to your client’s words.
There’s certainly a time and place for giving advice—after all, that’s why clients come to you. But when a client is speaking, your role is to help them articulate their thoughts fully. By honoring their perspective first, you gain invaluable insights that can inform better, more personalized guidance.

Mindful listening is more than a soft skill; it’s a cornerstone of trust in any advisor-client relationship. By being genuinely present—free from distractions, ready to engage—you not only catch subtle details but also signal respect and empathy. Over time, this fosters deeper connections and more effective financial life planning.
Whenever a client asks, “What do you think?” make sure your thoughts are rooted in genuine understanding rather than a hasty guess. In the competitive world of financial advice, the ability to truly listen may just be the most powerful differentiator of all.
Want to Learn More?
Money Quotient trains financial professionals in the True Wealth process and helps them implement the concepts into their practices. The first step is to learn about the Fundamentals of True Wealth Planning.
References and Influences
Dalai Lama & Howard Cutler: The Art of Happiness
Gillihan, Seth: Mindful Cognitive Behavioral Therapy
Hanh, Thich Nhat: You Are Here
Hanson, Rick & Richard Mendius: Buddha’s Brain
Harris, Dan: 10% Happier
Harris, Sam: Waking Up
Kabat-Zinn, Jon: Wherever You Go, There You Are
Miller, William: Listening Well
Rosenberg, Marshall: Nonviolent Communication
Sofer, Oren Jay: Say What You Mean